Jamie Goffin, LCSW
As the New Year 2019 approached, many of us are considered what kind of changes we can make for the New Year. Creating a goal or a plan can actually be uplifting and effective. For many of us, the New Year brings feelings of hope. But most of us know that change can wear off, be hard and even unrealistic. As Brene Brown talks about a predictable pattern around resolutions; you can see that resolutions begin to unravel quickly:
- January 1- This resolution is going to be awesome!
- January 5- I’m awesome.
- January 10- This sucks.
- January 20- I suck
To avoid feeling like the last one “I suck”, I decided this year was going to be the year of Acceptance. While all those around me were talking about changing, I decided to embrace “it is what it is.” I thought about those things in my life that I could let go, that no longer serve me and how I could reflect on those things from a whole new perspective.
So, how will I do this? The answer is practicing the idea of “radical acceptance.” Tara Brach in her book Radical Acceptance writes all about this and practices in a way I can never do. She’s been meditating with Buddhist monks for years, I’ll keep practicing in those small moments… as Tara writes, “accept it and sit with it… and watch it pass.”
“The curious paradox is when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” – Carl Rogers
Here’s to 2019!